Sickening...10 Nov, 2010 | Posted by: dini
Word started getting around today in a global kind of way that an asshole named Phillip R. Greaves II had self-published an ebook called "The Pedophile's Guide to Love and Pleasure: a Child-lover's Code of Conduct". In itself, a very disturbing event, but that Amazon.com has it listed on its site for $4.79 per copy is just outrageous! Apparently there are no restrictions or guidelines for "authors" - and I use the term loosely here - wishing to sell the contents of their sick and twisted minds on Amazon's site. Isn't that comforting a thousand different ways?!Though I have no firsthand knowledge of exactly what the "author" has written, a little research into the publication has turned up some seriously disturbing stuff. If it's true - and I suspect it is - Amazon isn't going to have any choice but to remove the offensive book from its virtual shelves because I do not doubt that the public outrage is going to be swift and noisy. While I also suspect that Amazon doesn't give a damn about the anger it's causing, they will cave in if they believe that the backlash will damage their overall sales. Bottom lines trump common sense every time.
I'm shocked. Honestly. I cannot believe that anything the sick mind can conjure up and commit to paper - real or virtual - can be as easily distributed as that. Amazon apparently doesn't care what kind of trash appears on its site as long as it stands to gain from the sale of it, and if we didn't know it before this incident, we certainly do now.
I don't doubt that Amazon will stand on the "free speech" argument and defend that sick bastard's right to publish as many memoirs, or how-to's for seducing kids as his filthy mind and hands can produce. They won't be alone either. There are people who will defend Greaves right to publish whatever the hell he wants to because while it's offensive to most, it's welcome porn to others.
In other news, I'm broken-hearted tonight by a story I saw on the news.
A young teen-aged girl with Down Syndrome has fallen through the ministry cracks in a way that angers and offends me, and makes me sad enough to cry with the horror of it all.
Young Amy, a mentally challenged girl, was left in her drug-addicted and alcoholic mother's care despite the attempts of her two older brothers to have her removed from the filthy trailer they lived in. The guys described their mother as abusive and neglectful, and often genuinely cruel to them and the little sister they both wanted desperately to protect. They had even once removed Amy from the home themselves but were forced to return her by a system that didn't see their mother as a potential danger to their sister.
No one was paying attention and Amy's mother died of a dug overdose. For nine days she lay undiscovered in the trailer she shared with her daughter, and for those nine days this poor little girl, unaware of just how bad the situation was, did her best to feed, water, and medicate her decomposing mother back to life, while she herself was wasting away.
*breathe, nadine*
I'm caught between anger and abject sadness that this young girl had to endure such a nightmare. Had the ministry paid attention when the boys came forward and told them what kind of life Amy was being subjected to, this whole tragedy could have been averted.
But no one listened…
*sigh*
Living the Lie...20 Oct, 2010 | Posted by: dini
While sorting through the huge backlog of unread email I've managed to accumulate in the last little while, I sifted through the rather large directory of "spiritual" mail I subscribed to a dozen years ago and was a little amazed by the amount of articles that encourage readers to "live your authentic life".I pondered that for awhile. "Authentic life…" as defined by the spiritualists and the Oprah's of the world. In the end I realized that every avenue of thought brought me back to the same main street where there were no answers to be found. Just a question. One single question. Authentic life...What the hell does that even mean?!
Life, being exactly what it is, does not lend itself well to authenticity. It's an impossible, silly concept by that definition. There is not one person among us who lives an authentic life, and if they claim they are, they're lying, which in fact, is and of itself, not authentic at all.
We are what we are. By nature or nurture, and certainly by experience and by example, we've been shaped to be exactly who we are. We all live lies. Lies make the world go 'round. We're all scarred by plenty of somethings, and lots of someones, and we all carry baggage we'd love to put down but can't. We adjust to our lives of lies and facades and of heavy baggage, and we keep on keeping on. It's really the best that any of us can do.
It's wonderful that are tons of teachers out there who want to show us a better way but each day brings its own unique challenges and tests of our character and sometimes it's enough to be satisfied that you got through the day in one, relatively sane piece, without taking a moment out to flog yourself for being less than authentic in the way you presented yourself at any given moment in your day. Lies and facades are the only true "authentic" and to pretend that if you could just spend enough time working to excavate your - by their definition - authentic self, you'd be a happier, much more balanced and sane person. It's just ridiculous and unreasonable. The only way to accomplish that is to go back to a time in your life when you weren't touched by the nonsense and the trials and tribulations of living an actual life… but who wants to be a fetus again?!
I appreciate the efforts of the authors who take the time to write that stuff and then kindly fill my inbox with it, but while it's sometimes inspiring, it's also largely unrealistic. I read it. I delete it.
I feel bad for being so dismissive, but that's just me being "authentic".
Aging Sucks... Seriously!11 Oct, 2010 | Posted by: dini
I've forgotten how to be a writer!There was a time when I was pretty damned adequate with the written word, but lately… I dunno. It's a skill-set that has taken a bit of a beating.
I have this idea that I need to be in a certain frame of mind to get the job done. No distractions. No discomfort. The planets lined up just so… It's a chore now. Writing never used to be a chore. When I think about sitting down to write something now, I run through that silly checklist and then groan a little before moving on to something that requires no real thought. It's easier to mop a floor or throw in a load of laundry.
How sad is that?!
Mars vs. Venus08 Oct, 2010 | Posted by: dini
I'm having a great deal of trouble lately understanding the whole mars and venus dynamic. It baffles me that all the things our men knew about us, and seemingly accepted when they entered into these relationships, become points of contention somewhere down the road. Sure, we've changed. In some ways for the better and in others perhaps not so much, but the essence of who we are remains pretty much the same. If certain behaviours and habits were acceptable in the beginning, why are they not acceptable now?I think that in the grand scheme of things men got off pretty lucky. They weren't designed to be plagued by hormonal shifts throughout the better part of their adult lives. PMS, though a running joke in most relationships, is really not a joking matter at all. Relationships have collapsed under the weight of the misery that drops by our homes once a month and stays for a week or more at a time. Guys think we exaggerate the effects. They never seem to get how hard we have to fight sometimes to keep from spinning right out of control.
Later in life we get to experience the joys of menopause. More crazy fluctuations in hormones, hot flashes, feeling emotional for no reason at all, moments of anger that eclipse reason, depression, insomnia, weight gain… the list goes on and on. Every day is a new adventure in feeling and being and surviving the misery. It doesn't run on a timetable either. It's not like we can hope for at least a couple of "good" weeks a month when everything sort of slides back into "normal", or wait for that period to show up and tip the balance back to sane and rational again. Menopause is one cruel bitch. It takes hostages and tortures the hell out of them. As hard as we had to work at times to control the PMS thing, seems like a walk in the park compared to the effort it takes to reign in the meno-monster almost all the time.
Men don't appreciate what we're going through. Then. Now. Or probably ever. It's not something they've ever had to deal with on a personal level and let's face it, most men wander through life with the belief that if it isn't a problem for them, it's not a problem, period. Rather than try to understand, or be supportive, they choose instead to disengage, disconnect, and otherwise ignore your plight. It is after all, your problem, not theirs, and their patience for your problems is thin at the best of times. As long as it doesn't interfere in any large way with their sex life, nothing is a problem.
Sex is a whole other arena. Even when we've all but lost interest in it, it remains our job to see that they're taken care of. Not many of us could get away with deciding for both of us that that part of the relationship is over. We hear about it, a lot! Many times it's presented in a joking kind of way but it doesn't take a Mensa member to know that every dig is meant to remind us that we're failing as wives if we've closed up shop. On the other hand, men can - and do - close up shop with no notice, no discussion, and no apology when hormone and mood fluctuations caused by andropause land on their doorsteps. It's a short walk from removing sex from your relationship to removing intimacy too, but since guys equate intimacy with sex, it's not so surprising that the death of one is usually the death of both.
So, what are we supposed to do? We've come this far in life only to find out that who we've always been is suddenly who we're not entitled to be anymore. We have to work so damned hard to fight "nature" and biology because the darker side of being a female - at any age - is unacceptable. It's a real struggle sometimes to stay put and make yourself believe that if you tough it out for one more hour, or one more day, maybe things will get better. Sometimes they do but the "better" is fleeting.
Sooner or later - and usually sooner - you'll be who you are and he'll seem surprised, as though he's never seen that side of you before, and you'll start the cycle all over again.
That's life I guess...
Wasting Time...01 Oct, 2010 | Posted by: dini
The internet is down. Has been for a couple of hours now. While my laundry mingles and mates with Ricky's laundry in the warmth of the dryer, I need something to do. Messing with my blog is as good as anything, I guess.About the name. Those of you who have been with me since the early days know that somewhere along the line, I became "the blog goddess". Thanks to whomever slapped that moniker on me. It was a lot to live up to back in the day.
Anyway, I resurrected the "goddess" part simply because I am. *snort* The rest of it is very self-explanatory. Aging really does have a way of stealing your humour. I'm probably at my best - or at least my most authentic - when I'm grumpy. I think there's truth to that since Ricky spends an inordinate amount of time and energy trying to keep me in that state. Kudos to you, hubby dear! Your wish is my source of aggravation and stuff.
So, it's early in the redesign game. We'll see how it goes...
GOD Hates You...10 Sep, 2010 | Posted by: dini
Wow… I could go on and on about all the things in my little world that piss me off but with so much hatred and ignorance in the world, I have bigger fish to fry.I’m going to start with that ignorant shit in Florida, the pastor, Terry Jones, who is planning – or maybe not – to burn a copy of the Quran on 9/11 to protest the building of an Islamic center at “ground zero”.
WTF?!
To backtrack a bit, I personally am not understanding why it’s such an affront to American sensibilities that an Islamic center is being proposed at all. Isn’t denying them the right to gather there a slap in the face to every innocent Islamic person who had as much to do with 9/11 as you or I did? Seriously… do that many Americans find it comforting to blame an entire nation for the extremist acts of a few?
Religion sucks. It exists and serves primarily as an excuse for some really sick behavior, but while I don’t agree with organized religion on any level, I certainly do believe in the freedom to practice it, regardless of who you are or what name your god goes by. Burning any religion’s “holy book” just to make a point is nothing more than an open invitation for even more sick behavior in the name of… whatever name your god goes by. Where the hell will it all end?!
Pastor screwed-in-the-head Jones obviously has no respect for his own “god”, or for his god-fearing followers, and certainly not for the innocent people he’s planning to throw under the bus if he can honestly say that his “god” would sanction such a stupid, immoral, and childish act. Someone ought to tell him that burning a bible – any bible – is a fast track to hell, and I can guarantee that he won’t have to wait to die to experience the wrath of millions of angry souls.
At what point will rabid religious leaders and unstable zealots realize that perpetuating anger and hatred in the name of any god are really just acts of selfishness? It takes a truly demented and frightening, self-serving waste of DNA with a god complex to make a decision that isn’t going to affect only themselves, but hundreds, thousands, and even millions of people who were never even consulted.
Just one more reason in my ever-growing list of reasons to despise organized religion and all that it stands for – or against.
I’d hope the Pastor comes to his senses before he puts so much at risk, but his kind is obviously without sense.
What a world…
Skén:nen